I am sorry to tell you that I will not be addressing the topic of glasses frames today, and I know you are sad. But I heard you and LEOPARD IT IS!
Okay. Kidding. I just heard 4027838492 people go, "NOOOOOOO!"
Last night I went with my friend Laura and Mary-Tyler-Moore date Dick Whitman to see Friends with Benefits.
Remember on Mary Tyler Moore? How she'd go on dates with good-looking men and they'd drop her off at the door and you never really got to know them? That is kind of all y'all and Dick Whitman. I just throw his name out there and show you an elusive picture and that's all you get.
Lest you think D. Whitman is whipping something up at the stove, you should know he is as into cooking as I am. I was basically forcing him to make hummingbird food because his feeder was empty.
Dick Whitman has a really cool house and I have informed him I am moving in. I think when you have known someone seven weeks, and you are married to someone else, and when that someone you are moving in with is deathly allergic to pets, that there is no other next right step than to gather your things and your 60 pets and move right in. But if you saw that cool house you would make no sense, either.
Here is a blurry shot of Dick Whitman's porch. Note the spilled hummingbird food.
Anyway, Friends with Benefits was funny, of course, and for those of you who have seen it, my friend Dave says "Strictly dickly" all the time, so I know for sure that is his line. Also, is there any way I could get Mila Kunis' body yet continue my torrid affair with Chik-Fil-A? Please advise.
That is all I have to tell you, except that Tallulah has not had a bath since January because Marvin used to lift her into the tub, and I know I could probably do it if I had to, but I have had this fear I would drop her and break all of her legs. However, she is sitting next to me right now:
And decaying bodies in rainforests smell better. I really need to address this issue today. Look at her giant ET back foot. I love Talu. {News flash.}
Don't forget that a week from today we will be meeting here for book clurb. Clurb. What the hell is wrong with me. We will be discussing Three Dog Life. Click Mince Words with June for the deets. Who is annoying? Deets.
Clurb.
Carp.
