Dudes, I wasn't even gonna blog at you today, but this happened and we need to discuss.
Honest to GOD. With the afro already. Who am I, the white Angela Davis?
It's exciting that I'm blogging at you from this angle, isn't it? Did I tell you how moving my computer resulted in me accidentally banging my modem and hitting the reset button, which then meant I had no Internet and it took 40 minutes with AppleCare and half an hour with my cable company for us to figure that out?
Once, someone as horrible as me sent me a forwarded email. This guy's wife had died--and I KNOW I AM TERRIBLE, OKAY?--and he had sent this mass email saying he knew his wife was an angle in the sky. Over and over he said it. "She is now an angle. With God." God does a lot of trigonometry.
Okay, see? I actually don't know if trigonometry is the right math word to be using. That's how bad I am at math. Do you use angles or even angels in trigonometry?
The reason I happen to have a photo of me before I went to sleep with a paw is because I had been up listening to the rain and emailing with ...friend, and while I waited for his replies I took photos with my phone. Have I ever mentioned how if the house were burning I'd save the phone? I can get other pets.
I emailed ...friend till I fell asleep, and let me assure you these were some deep, important emails. "Is it raining there?" "No." "How can that be? We're three miles apart." "I think we're four miles apart." I mean, this stuff had to be said right then and there. Anyway, I still had the phone when I woke up so I captured Talu's morning lips.
I was reading (Thorn Birds!) (our deep book club book if you didn't know) on the angry chair back there and she was pawing down at me, and I knew she wanted to leave the window, and my dilemma as a cat parent of a blind-ish kitty was, do I help her or see if she can solve it herself?
Oh, it broke your heart, her little white paw poking at the air. I know her depth perception is the worst part of her wonky eyes. Anyway after awhile she came crashing down on my shoulder, like a demented heavy parrot, scratching my clavicle to Tibet and back, but she did it. On her own.
I guess that's all I have to tell you. I have to go (wait for it) proofread statistics, but before I do, can I show you some vacation shots of a person you don't know? Good.
My friend Steve and I have known each other since, oh, 1986 or something. We met in Michigan but he moved to Seattle, so we got to be friends there, too. He is on a road trip and put up pictures on Facebook, and this made me want to get in the car and look at ludicrous things so bad I could spit on a mountain-climbing bear with good proportions.
Can you stand it? Can you stand it that you're in your cubicle right now, no windows in sight, and this is out here just for the looking at? Let's all get in the car right now. June's Spontaneous Road Trip!
It is impossible to take a bad picture of any outdoor plastic dinosaur. Marvin and I must have 80 of these in our photos, which I guess are probably split up now. Marvin, I better have PRECISELY 40 plastic dinosaur pictures. I'm countin'!
Steve has no idea I stole these, because it's like 7 a.m. in Seattle and I didn't want to be all coffee dialing him in the wee hours. So I hope he doesn't kick my ass.
And you don't need to leave the "I knew these weren't YOURS cause we could actually see the image!" comments. NO NEED. NO NEEEEEED. You know I'll get them anyway.
You are all angles in the sky, you big putzes.