Guess who's sick of me. Is it ...friend's cat? Did she not sign on for this being-a-blog-star thing and really wishes I'd stick that iPhone in my nethers?
The good news is I brought her fleas. She lives in an apartment, never even really sees the outdoors, and we over here at dogs-in-the-yard land are run over with fleas. The vet and I are practically pinned, so many times have we been on the phone trying to solve this flea circus I have going, over here. In the meantime, ...friend said, "Oh, and I found a flea on me the other day. I hope that was the only one."
Yeah. Denial. It's a lovely and productive thing. Last night I heard ...kitty scratching and yay! Yay, me! Nice bug-bringing! Sexy. Bringing sexy back. Bringing scratching back.
So how are y'all? Yesterday Faithful Reader Nithya got married, in London, and she totally didn't invite any of us to the wedding. Faithful Reader Davida had a birthday on Friday, and she blew us all off as well. We never get asked anywhere.
In the meantime, this is ...friend's birthday weekend, and really his birthday is Tuesday but I keep saying, "We can do whatever you want! The world is your oyester! It's your birthday week/weekend/birthday eve eve" and so forth. I am sorry to tell you that on his real birthday he has asked for an apple pie. I said I would make whatever he wanted, because the world is his oyster, and that's what he wants and I know you're all thinking, "Well, June is such a whiz in the kitchen. This should be nothing for her." Which is entirely true except for the part where I am not remotely a whiz in the kitchen.
Whatever. I have faith I will be able to pull it off, or at least drive through McDonald's for one of their apple pies at the last minute.
In the meantime, yesterday ...friend's mom came to town to take him to lunch, and I tagged along because I am a total freeloader. I had always wanted to meet his mom, because you know what? ...friend is well brought up. He's polite and opens doors and does all those things you wish boys would do. And his mother is just lovely. She has the pretty accent, you know what I mean? The lovely lilting classy kind. The women in TinyTown had the same accent, and sometimes I'd be in the church office and they'd all be setting something up in the kitchen, and I'd just close my eyes and listen to their voices.
Anyway, I also met ...friend's very nice brother and aunt and uncle, and we had a good time, although I'm certain they all feel sorry for ...friend that he couldn't get a woman with normal hair.
Because, humid yesterday? Hot? Did my hair grow larger with every second as we headed to that restaurant?
Anyway, afterward, ...friend and I got ice cream. Because the world was his oyster. And you know, we say all kinds of hilarious things when we're together and I always think Ima remember what they were so I can tell you, then I get here and blank. BLANK. Sometimes I think, Oh, that'd be an excellent title for a post and I get here and did I mention blank? I get into some kind of ...friend trance or something.
We hung out downtown for the afternoon, and stopped into my friend Kit's store, and she told me Dick Whitman and his girlfriend had just been there. Hmph! Nice NOT CALLING ME when you're in Greensboro, Whit! I'd have blown him off anyway, as the world was ...friend's oyster.
Eventually, we went to a Vietnamese restaurant, and I will abstain from my usual Agent Orange Chicken joke, but I looked at my teacup and my tea leaves were smiling at me. That has to be a good sign, right?
I have to go, as even though I just spent every iota of my weekend with ...friend, we are going to a movie in an hour. I do not know if I've told you he picks the most depressing movies, ever, and we have seen no less than 20 suicide-inducing films since I met him. We were looking at the trailer for one movie that's out today, and the reviewer wrote, "Tense, creepy and unsettling." Oh, can we? Can we stampede right out to that movie? Sounds FANTASTIC!
"I'm going to see that one," said ...friend. "Just not today."
Good. Guess whose world is no longer his oyster, so much?
We're gonna see something about French people and their sex lives, which should be a long movie because don't French people just sit around being sexy all day? When they aren't walking their poodles and smoking Gauloises?
Talk at you later, when I will bring more stereotypes to this fine blog.





