My friend Steve (who is not to be confused with Faithful Reader CVSteve nor my old boyfriend Steve who I saw this summer, but ANOTHER friend Steve who we decided in the comments should ID himself as Huge Member Steve) sent me this image yesterday.
Last night I was trying to sleep, and kept thinking of the box--"Cats Love It!" and this cat's face and I kept shaking the bed, I was giggling so hard. Cats love it! Dying.
See. In hysterics again. Ohmygod, that poor cat. He loves it! Clearly.
Also, we all need to go out and get a unicorn horn for our cats. If anyone does so, send me the picture.
Didn't you all send me pictures of your messy coffee tables and didn't I 100% fail to put any on my blog? Also, didn't I just have a giveaway? Who won? I know I never sent anyone anything. What the Sam Hill did I say I was sending you? Was it Abraham Lincoln floss or something?
In other news, I am very tempted to put on here a photo Dick Whitman put of himself on Facebook, in which he's wearing a hospital gown and we see it open in the back, but I am abstaining. Because that is the good kind of friend I am. I just MENTION it to everyone without showing it.
Lean on me. When you're not strong. And I'll be your friend. I'll help you carry on.
Anyway, his clavicle hurts. He was having it looked at. That's why he had on the gown. And you know, he DID put it on Facebook, for all the world to see, so I don't see how it would hurt for me to show it here. But I will not. I do not want Dick Whitman getting all pit on my azz.
None of this is why I gathered you all here today, however. What I WANTED to discuss was this:
Somehow Ned and I got into a discussion wherein I called him motivated. "I am the least-motivated person on earth," he said. That's what he said. Ned. The person who said, "Ima quit smoking after doing it for 25 years" and just did it, two years ago. The person who said, "Ima start working out again" and does so every night. The person who said, "I'm going to eat better" and now eats the Green Giant's weight in salads every week. I mean, he's the most motivated person I know. I say I'm gonna have a giveaway and can't manage the three clicks it'd take to get you your cat unicorn horn.
Cats love it!
Clearly you have no idea how much that slays me.
"In a million years I'd never imagine anyone would describe me as motivated," said salady Ned.
This made me think of the time my best friend from elementary school said her husband finally had to realize she was not a tower of strength. I forget what the scenario was, and no, my best friend was not married in elementary school. She told me this story recently. We were best friends in elementary school. Smarty.
Anyway, as I said, I forget the particulars, I just remember thinking, "No one has ever had to realize I'm not a tower of strength. No one's ever said, 'Oh that June. She's tough on the outside...'"
In fact, one time Marvin was talking to a woman who'd been home showering, and someone broke in and raped her right there. In her shower! Can you imagine? Cats love it. Anyway, Marvin said, "My wife would never recover from that. She's not strong."
I was kind of offended, but god, that is totally the truth. I would NEVER.RECOVER. from that.
So my point is, what is one way no one would ever describe you? And are you sure?