Two German shepherds have moved in to the house around the corner, and their back yard faces ours. There used to be other dogs who lived back there, and Edsel and Tallulah would run the length of the fence with them in utter delight. Now that there are two new neighbors, and German ones at that, old Goofus and Gallant, here, need to determine who's boss, so now every time they go out they're all
WOO WOOO WOOO WOO WOOO! WOO! ASH HOLESES! WOO WOO! AND NOTHER TING: WOOO WOO WOOO!
So that's relaxing. And I love how tough they are when there's a fence separating them. If these medium-sized mutts met those giant German shepherds in REAL life, it'd be all, oh, haiii. you, um, sertenlee pretty, mr. and miss german shephurd! yes, dunka shane! dunka shane for showing nice teefs! we has to, um, oh, look at time! yes, teef pretty. okay, gooden tags or whatev!
In other news, I got an exercise bike off Craigslist.
It's an Airdyne, so the harder I push on it, the more air blows back and it creates resistance. Sometimes I kiss the bike with my tongue so I have the French resistance. In other news, brain has officially snapped.
Ned and I sat here like idiots the other night, waiting for the woman who sold me the bike to show up. We were so officially annoyed with her, because she'd said she'd get it to me two weeks ago, and then she didn't and then she went to the beach, and in the meantime my plantar fasciitis wasn't going anywhere so THANKS, and then she was an hour late Monday night. But when she got here, she was super hot, so we had that as a reward.
And thin? I hope it was the bike that made her thin, but in fact she said she used it maybe seven times. I've used it once so far, I mean other than that official genuine workout I am doing in the photo above, and I do not look like her yet.
I guess that's all I have to tell you about my dumb life, other than we went to see an EVEN DUMBER movie last night, and in the past three days we have seen two extra-dumb movies. Last night's was a documentary on the making of The Shining, which seemed like it'd be interesting, but really it was made by someone who clearly smokes too much pot and has too much time on his hands.
"The number 42 shows up many times in the movie. It's uncanny." Then they show one time the number 42 shows up in the movie. Oh, and he counted. There were 42 cars in the parking lot at the beginning of the movie.
But somehow in the course of the evening, Ned and I got to talking about aspirations. Not like when you get too much fluid in your lung, but I mentioned the Very Important Lesson I learned while watching LA Shrinks, and shut up it's a good show. The hot shrink with the lip implants said in order to be happy, you have to
- Have something to do (other than watch The Shining 3239320 times)
- Have something to love
- Have something to look forward to
"So, what're you looking forward to?" I asked Ned, knowing that what I was looking forward to was when we could leave wherever we were and go make out for 87 hours. Did I mention am still in ridiculous phase?
But I think it has to be bigger than that, the thing you're looking forward to. It has to be loftier than yay, in a few minutes I get to make out with this boy I adore. I should be planning a trip to Spain, or entering Edsel in a Best in Show competition, or making a line of June wigs or something.
Do you have any aspirations? Any big ones? Anything to look forward to? What are they? And what should mine be, do you think? And if you HAVE aspirations, what's stopping you from achieving them?
Crap. My extremely tough dog just let himself out the screen door to continue yelling at the Germans. I'd better go give this my undivided achtung.