I know you've thought of little else since we last spoke, so I'll tell you right off the bat that I love the new deodorant. June gives it two pits up. And by "pits," I don't mean Tallulah.
I'm writing you from upstairs at Kaye's house now, as she comes home today. I am up here in her guest room with this anatomically correct teddy bear that Kaye inexplicably has. Maybe later she and I will have a talk about where the bad man touched her. I don't really know.
I spent a great deal of yesterday schlepping everything to this closet, and moving my toiletries, which have you met me? That took awhile. I was up and down the steps so much that my calves hurt today, and then yesterday afternoon I finally took a shower and headed right to Kaye's bathroom by habit.
Son of a...
So I had to schlep up here where all the toiletries be at. Wheeeerrrrrrre the toiletries are. Someone waits for meeee.
The point is, I am writing this on Sunday afternoon and then I won't post in the morning, because I have my newest Oprah and Depak--or as I like to call them, Opack--meditation series. Every so often those two will band together and create a free 21-day meditation you can take part in.
Google fucking it.
So I start tomorrow morning, and I will blog at night. June's mixin' it up. That means tomorrow night I have to write a blog post and also write my latest Purple Clover, so that'll be a stress-free evening. Actually, writing does not make me stressed. Oh, here's my Purple Clover for this week.
Also, I loved how the comments from Friday morphed into JUNE'S MOVING. LET'S ALL THINK GOOD THOUGHTS FOR JUNE! and I was all, wow. Not moving. Not even at all. I move the 11th. It all turned into a huge Save Ferris thing.
But speaking of writing, it was Halloween at work on Friday, and on Thursday night after I got home, I got an email from work, this automatically generated one, saying I'd missed a deadline for something I had to write. I mean, I had NO IDEA that thing was due so soon. So on Friday, in that charming open floor plan with everyone being all Halloweeny,
I had to do a ton of research and write like a demon because I was almost 24 hours past my deadline. I felt not at all like Cinderella. Hey, has anyone seen Ryan, by the way?
My tenant was Rosie the Riveter, and in less than two weeks she'll be Rosie the Mover. LET'S ALL THINK GOOD THOUGHTS FOR ROSIE! GODSPEED, ROSIE, IN YOUR MOVE! Y'all were KILLING me with those comments. I was reading them, all, I'm right HERE! At Kaye's! Not moving!
At 2:00, we had our work costume contest, and I did get up from my missed deadline to see everyone stroll down the loading dock.
One group went as the Kardashians, and you have to admit pregnant Kim was sort of hilarious.
At 4:00, people's kids came and we handed out candy. At this point my story was done and my deodorant held out, so yay, Halloween. As someone who prefers kittens to kids, I do still enjoy seeing all the costumes, and also recognizing some kids growing up year after year. I know. I have no idea what's wrong with me, either.
One kid was dressed as Peppa Pig, and seeing as I am an "adult" and have no children, I had no fekking clue who that was. The point is, Peppa Pig decided she was done trick or treating and wanted to work, which if only we all had that work ethic. She sat at her mom's desk, typing and answering the phone, and really how often do you answer the phone anymore? Remember when phones used to ring in offices?
So this other kid, dressed as Buzz Lightyear, came to her office, because there was candy on a chair right outside the office. Old Peppa Pig, in there, looked up from her work. "Oh! Hello, Buzz Lightyear," she said. The kid dressed as Buzz said to his dad, "How did Peppa Pig get a job here?"
I had been planning to be a sugar skull for Halloween, but sadness and ennui took over and I went as a sad ennui-y person who'd missed a deadline. So. Also, I looked on Facebook today and everyone and their anatomically correct teddy bear went as a sugar skull, so I'm glad I didn't do it.
I'd better go. Griff says my posts are too long, and certainly we should all be getting our life's direction from Griff.
P.S. Because when is June brief?
June's Coworkers' Senior Picture Poses
This is a reenactment of her actual senior picture. Dying.