Killing season is taxing.
Speaking of which, Eds and I were in the park last night, after Chicken Watch 2016, wherein this time Eds put his paw up like he was some sort of pointer, a thing he almost never does, and I wonder if he's finally realizing chikkens be reel.
Oh my god with me. SO WE WERE IN THE PARK, and we were way back by all the foliage, when this bunny LEAPED away from us with a crash, and we'd had no idea she'd been there. I know it was a girl bunny because she had a Real Housewives carrot koozie. Anyway, it scared the shit outta both of us. I wish I had a video of us leaping out our skins and back into them again.
Speaking of koozies, and I don't know why we call them that, I was poking around on the Facebook yesterday and I noted the Scottish Inn has a traveling-drink-koozie page.
The Scottish Inn is a RIDICULOUS/fabulous bar in my hometown; it has plaid wallpaper, and it's dark and small and that's where all my friends and I met up the day after Thanksgiving 2012, when I took Ned with me home. It was the only bar that was open at 2 p.m. on a Friday. And people were already drunk. We soon joined them.
I remember actual families, decent people, filing in at dinnertime and there was the whole room, drunk. That's when we left--I was too ashamed of myself.
In my lifetime, I've been to the Scottish Inn only a handful of times, but each time has been pivotal. And now they have a Facebook page where you take your drink koozie, and for the love of god I MUST HAVE A SCOTTISH INN DRINK KOOZIE, and take a photo of it on your trips. Am obsessed. I'd take that bitch everywhere, load up that Facebook page. You know, with all my travels.
I don't travel much, do I? I guess I'm a homebody. Who goes out a lot.
In other news, here's a photo of me. And my cleave. Jeez. Anyway, we had to take selfies for work, for this project, and "had to" is a stretch--we were asked to. I was the first responder.
Bitchy-resting-face Alex used my phone to take hers, and Dear BRF Alex: You use my phone, you get put in my blog. If only we could capture BRF Alex sleeping like Iris.
Oh, and speaking of pets, listen.
I really regret not keeping that puppy. I mean, I think about it when I wake up every morning. I think about how he's not here when I get home. I fucking loved that puppy. I think I made a mistake. I even looked on my phone to see if I still had the texts with the woman who'd raised him from being under her porch, just to see if the puppy is okay. Fortunately I deleted those texts, so I don't bug her and assure her of my craziness. But really. I want a puppy. Is that insane?
These past five years have been stupid, man. First Marvin left, which I really didn't think he'd do, but there it was. Then I had no job and I was poor and that was stressful, and I met Ned and fell stupidly in love and we got that beautiful house and that failed--which was devastating--and then my sweet Talu has to up and get fatal cancer when she's just barely 8 years old. Barely legal.
I'm not saying I haven't had one happy minute since five years ago or anything, but I just feel like maybe I broke a mirror and don't remember it or something. I want a reason to wake up and go, Ooooo! I wanna wake up and say, I have a puppy! I want to get to know a new dog personality. AND THAT DOG HAD A GOOD ONE I COULD TELL. Dammit.
Anyway. Regrets. I have a few. This is one of them. Wish I hadn't done it. Which is what, you know, regret is.
Meanwhile, I'm scheduled to get dry needling. The new hygienist also has migraines, and she said it made a huge difference for her. Apparently, she gets migraines and, like, sees an actual migraine doctor and so on. She was all, Who do you see and I was all, I just get migraines and take pills when I get them.
I figure going to the doctor about migraines is like going to the doctor about a cold. There's not a hell of a lot you can do, medically. I avoid weird sleep patterns, I avoid MSG, I stay away from rational thought. That's what works for me.
But after a month or two of really good luck, lately I've been plagued again. In fact, as I write this, I have a headache. I've had nine med-necessary migraines in 18 days. So I'll try the dry needling. It's like acupuncture, but in places where your muscles are knotted. It somehow loosens them up, and it's not what you'd call fun, but apparently it really helps. So that's next week. Add it to the list of things I've tried.
When you start to send me the "Have you tried..." email, here's the list: Cupping, acupuncture, Chinese herbs, Botox, biofeedback, Topamax, Chinese tea, food/sleep/exercise tweaks, trying to wean myself from all headache meds, yoga positions, drinking 100 ounces of water a day, magnesium/vitamin B/some other supplement in one pill, experimental drugs, Maxalt, Imitrex, sticking my head in the oven.
So when you send me the "Have you tried/Maybe you should" email, please peruse that list. And if you email me anything about Excedrin I will personally drive to your house and twist your testes.
I'd better go. My hair is wet and I'm makeupless. Looking hot.