Today, Ima talk to you while I do my makeup. Here I am, looking like one of those women who doesn't shave her parts, whose one iota of makeup is some tinted Burt's Bees balm.
Mmmm. Vision. You know, I am in no way a natural beauty. Never have been. Thank god I'm a drag queen with the makeup.
Combed my eyebrows, darkened them a little, and put on some undereye concealer. I never had a problem with dark circles till I started to use Latisse. It's one of the side effects. However, I've been out of Latisse for maybe a month now, and things keep coming up that I have to spend money on like glamorous water heaters. But, Dear Mom: My birthday is a week away. Nothing says Happy 50th! like a bottle of Latisse.
I assure you mom has already purchased and likely mailed my gifts, and there ain't no Latisse in there. Darn, that's the end.
A little foundation, some eye shadow. You'll note our regularly scheduled cat has been replaced by a dog. You won't BELIEVE what happens next! Click here!
And by the way, I totally forgot poor Edsel's birthday, on the 7th. Was too busy at King Kong. I thought of it last night, and went running into the room Edsel was in, and he immediately began beating his tail against the wall and had no idea why I was kissing him and giving him treats, but he didn't care.
Somehow eventually Tallulah got up there, too, and I have no idea how I ever slept with two dogs and two cats in a double bed like it was normal.
Anyway, now Edsel is 5. Man, has he calmed down.
Oh, also? I always forget how much he and Lily seem to like each other. They were totally making out last night, but by the time I got my photojournalism camera out, all I got was this and they broke it up.
Eye pencil mascara and expired lipstick. My lipstick has an expiration date on it, I am not kidding. I should have stopped using it back in March. Am living on edge.
So now I have to get dressed, but before I go, help me with a deep thought I was having the other day. What is the worst song of the '80s? I mean, there's the obvious We Built This City, and I do heartily detest that song, but what about Huey Lewis? The heart of rock and roll is still--oh, go fuck yourself.
Do share your thoughts.