I was just so NICELY napping on the couch, when someone had the nerve to stop with their DOGS, TWO of them, and let one of them poop on my lawn. The dog walker cleaned it up, but Tallulah had 47 fits about it and woke me up. She acts like she handles the lawn care at this establishment. When really all she does is leave her Kong on the lawn to get all buggy on the inside.
Obviously I am writing this on Wednesday night and I am going to publish this on Thursday a.m. Because I plan ahead that way. Don't you think "plan ahead" is redundant?
The most interesting thing that happened today is that I got my new checks. I opened a new checking account and the guy at the bank said, "You get free checks, unless of course you want pretty checks."
He said that with disdain, as if WHO in their RIGHT MIND would order pretty checks that you had to pay for when you could get free, boring checks.
"Yeah," I said. "Get me the book. I want to select the pretty checks."
So we are gonna have an exciting game here at Bye Bye, Pie. It's called How Well Do You Know June?
I am going to show you several types of pretty checks, and you guess which one I really got. Those who guess the right one will be in a drawing to win a delightful bacon tuxedo jigsaw puzzle.
This should delight the people who are still waiting for me to send their cupcake-flavored dental floss. And what else was I gonna send? And inflatable fruitcake? Do you like how I've gotten right on sending those?
Anyway, you know you want a jigsaw puzzle of someone wearing a bacon tuxedo. Who doesn't?
So here are the choices. Which check design would June choose? Hmmmm...
Would June Gardens pick a garden look?
What about puppy snickerdoodles? You know she likes her the puppies.
Eiffel Tower/Gay Paree images? I have an Eiffel Tower tattoo. I mean, June has an Eiffel Tower tattoo.
Bugs Bunny? I have shown you Bugs Bunny You Tube clips. Oh, I give up on speaking in third person.
How about girly roses? You know I like pink.
It's tough, isn't it? Hey, it's not easy to win a bacon tuxedo jigsaw puzzle. I can't just GIVE those away for NOTHING.
I would really like to get Marvin a bacon tuxedo. His niece's bat mitzvah is coming up next year. Perhaps we could emulate the outfits on this puzzle. How quickly will our invite get lost in the mail, do you think?
Okay. I look forward to your answers. You have until midnight Pacific time, Thursday, September 16 to guess.