Today is Marvin's birthday. He is 14.
Here he is about to open his gifts. That's my coffee, of course.
"what dis birfday? never herd. edsel not have birfdays. r you sure there is rully such a thing?"
In other news, Marvin's school picture came, in case anyone would like wallet-size editions. Do I get a kick out of the fact that he gets school pictures every year?
In other also too news, WHO CANNOT GET OVER THE ROYAL WEDDING?!?!?!
This is the best thing that has happened to me since 1981, when Diana and Charles married. Oh, I think Kate is lovely, and poised, and all those things I am not. In that interview I totally would have made a dick joke, I just know it. William would not know where to put me.
I guess I would have been the Sarah Ferguson of the royal family.
Didn't she look BEAUTIFUL in that blue dress to match her engagement ring?
LOOK AT HER. She is perfect.
I got like this over Diana, by the way, but to tell you the truth, I think she is lovelier than Diana, even. Oh, she is perfect. And I like William a lot. He seems like a real person and not all stuffy.
And did you SEE Camilla saying how excited she was? Oh, I just wanted to shove an avocado in her face. I do not know why I picked an avocado. Just every time I see her I get violently angry. Camilla. If I were Kate, I would make a dick joke and shove food in my stepmother-in-law's face.
This is why I am not a princess.
Marvin just came in to say goodbye and read what I wrote about Kate, whom I love, and he said, "You're perfect, too."
Here is an actual unretouched photo of what I look like right this instant.
Poor Marvin. He is only 14, what do you want from him?
