Honestly, I think my alarm is going off AFTER 7:00, because it seems like after I hit snooze 7949599 times and get up, it's always some shocking time like 7:49. My point is, it's late and Ima scream out this post in a hurry and it'll have errors and make no sense and READ ON and also those of you who thrive on telling me when I make a typo will have a field day today.
I have another statistics textbook to proofread, which is good because yay, money, so I started it last night after fake work. My pets like it when I'm just sitting there motionless on the couch. Since I no longer have a damn TV I am not doing that a lot anymore. Am I missing the Real Housewives? I am, aren't I?
Edsel played it cool from across the room. Because that's the way of his people, as you know. Cool, calm, distant.
Here's assistant editor Talu snuggled next to my work. If I miss anything, she paws at me like Lassie. "Is something the matter, girl? Did Timmy forget a semi-colon?" Actually, the owner of the statistics textbook company abhors semi-colons. When I'm done reading the whole book, I have to go back and do an electronic search; every time I come across two full sentences separated by a semi-colon the way I just did, I have to PLUCK IT OUT. PLUCK!
Yes, my job IS fascinating. And never tedious. But again, cash money! Word.
In other news, y'all have been sending in your BLOG PHOTOs like banshees. I mean, you've literally come over here all wailing. It's kind of eerie. I cannot imagine how long it's gonna take me to put them all up, but I have enjoyed seeing what you all look like, and sometimes you'e written nice little notes.
Speaking of pictures, my friend at work The Poet sent me a makeover site, and guess who made an error, there? Who has been innundated with the many, many looks of June, do you think? Beyonce-hair June. Pixie-cut June.
What say you to strawberry June? No matter WHOSE hair I put on, no one's was as fat as mine. My real hair is always splooking out on the sides.
Platinum June. I also plumped my lips and whitened my teeth. I love makeover sites. Oh, and the natural mascara, do you like that? I practically HAVE those lashes now, with my Latisse. Speaking of which, a faithful reader emailed me that she bought Latisse and had a terrible reaction and did I want hers, which, YAY! Someone's suffering is GREAT NEWS FOR ME!!!!
Before you FREAK OUT, you put Latisse on these disposable brushes, so it's not like I'm having eyelash sex with a stranger. "Latisse is POISON to dogs, June!"
Ima go now, as it's late and I will come to work as Bedraggled June, but let me know which hair color I should pick. Keep in mind my hair will never do either of those smoove looks.
XO, The Late June
