Yesterday, after a harrowing day at work--
I mean, it WAS kind of busy, but I also took time out to torture the receptionist who is SO OVER ME. We're having window cleaners come in this weekend, and she has sent out messages about it, and whenever she does, I write back.
"What a pane."
"I like the way you framed that email."
"You're so transparent."
Sadly for her, the date of the window-cleaning got changed, so naturally I wrote to tell her I was shattered, but then I told another editor what I was doing, and we dive-bombed her.
"Is the cleaning SILL going on?"
"I'm blind with rage that we aren't getting the windows cleaned sooner."
"So they're coming this weekend, a-LEDGE-edly."
Oh, you don't even know. And she TOTALLY IGNORES US, probably because she has things to do like answer the phone.
So I was busy with that along with my actual productive work, and then right after, my friend The Other June came over. Do y'all remember The Other June? I took a knitting class--and money well spent--and she was taking the class as well and I picked her up at the knitting store while we were signing up.
We used to go to the Farmers Market a lot when I was married and did things like get up early and go to the Farmers Market.
Anyway the plan was to go out for coffee and catch up on everything (i.e., hear me drone on about Ned. How boring of a friend I must be right now. "I like Ned." "Say, did I mention I like Ned?" I try not to do the thing where every subject can somehow become a Ned subject, like when Samantha finally liked someone and Charlotte mentioned she might adopt a Chinese baby and Samantha said, "Richard's opening a restaurant in China.")
(It is sad how much Sex and the City I know by heart. Did I tell you how we were flipping channels the other day, and an episode of SATC was on, and Ned said, "Okay, I KNOW THIS PLOT because you've told me about this one."
Aaaaaand I made this about Ned.)
Somehow coffee turned into us deciding to get manicures instead. It was only after I got out my wallet to pay that I realized I picked that same color I always pick these days.
The Other June got a more traditional cranberry color. Here's where the story ends. Get it. Do you? Wait, is that song even BY the Cranberries, or is that The Sundays? Stupid '90s bands.
After that we were headed to coffee and...
I mean, coffee shops are doing a LOT these days to bring in the noncoffee-drinker.
We totally went out to eat instead. Obvs. And Ned was IRKED because he called me later and was eating rice and beans while I had feasted at a fancy restaurant.
Oh, look. I mentioned Ned.
So that was my day, other than the part where I got irritated at Dick Whitman and I can't talk about that but trust me. I should have an extra super-secret blog. This can be Blog of Most Things and then I can have Blog of Stuff I Can't Blog About. Anyway, DW and I will be back to being nonirked friends probably in the next hour. So don't get all dramatic about it like the time I got mad at Ned and you had us broken up for life.
Oh look, I mentioned Ned.
Ima go now, but before I do, I just went to get coffee, since The Other June and I eschewed it last night, and poor blind Iris was drinking water from the dog's dish, when all of a sudden a cup came CRASHING down from the shelf, BOUNCED off the counter and CAREENED right into the dog's water bowl.
You have never seen someone leap so high in the air as poor Iris, who of course didn't see it coming till it was splashing onto her. Then she did the leap sideways down the hall thing, which is dignified.
Sadly, I can't find a reason to make this about Ned.
Okay, bye. I'm sure Ned says bye, too.
