Because my stupid computer room is still empty and the rest of my house is in shambles and I have no modem, all my iPhone pictures are still loaded on my phone. I saw this one this morning. It's the food from the cookout we had right before we noticed Lily was missing and my life got stupid.
Note there is no meat on my plate. Ned, um, was not timely with the chicken. It wasn't his fault. The coals wouldn't do whatever coals do. We had chicken for dessert. Really, the salad and potatoes and that ridiculously good corn were enough. We'd planned to drive around looking for houses to rent after but we looked for my cat instead.
Ned thinks Lily got swept up by the Rapture, and the rest of us are just left down here. She was the only one good enough to go.
Anyway. That's all that's going on here. Oh, and remember how last week, when I cared about things, I was getting all ready for my photo sesh at work, where they took pictures of me for the website? Yesterday I was distributing the newsletter and saw my photo as the art director worked on the new site at her desk. I looked adorable. Cannot get enough of self. Maybe that's why Lily left. She was sick and tired of bunking with Narcissus, over here.
I was trying to think of the last time I had just one cat. When Marvin left in 2011, he left only Francis, who was so sick at that point that it was like having 20 cats. Remember how I had to go to the special pet supply store and get him the Dick Van Patten pet food, with rabbit in it? You can't catch me cause the rabbit done died.
Yes it did.
Does anyone recall my most excellent line that I stole from my friend Marty Martin? The salesgirl, who was 11 years old, asked how many cans of Dick Van Patten cat food I wanted. "Eight is enough," I said, tattooing own name onto arm.
The 11-year-old totally didn't get it. My fine humor is lost on this generation. I am the Groucho Marx of my time. How he got into my pajamas I'll never know. Heh.
Anyway. Francis died six weeks after Marvin left, and then I got Roger and Anderson. So, not used to having one cat, is the thing. I mean, once I move in with Ned I'll be two-catted again, and man will she be thrilled. That cat could give lessons in glare, and I can't wait to see the one she gets when she meets Iris, who will not give two shits that there's a new cat. eyeriss say hello. got new yard to xplor.
And MAN do I ever save on cat food with just her. Twice now I've gone over with the bag and been all, hunh. She doesn't even need more food yet. I think she fills up on mice and toddlers.
Okay, I have to go. Ironically, the lilies bloomed in my yard overnight.
Catlessly,
June
