It's super cold and snowy here. And also too, remember when I put the computer in the back in November, when I wasn't thinking how this used to be a back porch? Yeah. Toasty.
And don't feel sorry for that dog. He's already been in and out twice today. He wants to go in the way back and bark with his friend. Everywhere we live, Edsel makes a friend in another yard. Their whole relationship consists of this:
Edsel: Rrrrr...bow-wow-WOW-wow!
Other dog in back: Rrrr, rrr, rrr, rrrr!
Edsel: WOWwowowowowowow!
I sense a relationship pattern.
Therapy with Edsel.
These are the leopard footie pajamas my mother got me for Xmas, and you'd better believe I threw these sexy beasts on last night when it was -4949549 below. That's the nice part about being single. You don't have to try to be hot when it's cold as a mug.
Oh, and speaking of mugs...
My friend Sandy's husband sent me this punctuation/spelling mug. Don't know what made him think of me. For example, it has "we're = we fucking are" and "it's = it fucking is."
Oh my god, so satisfying is this cup.
Do you know what bugs me? People who use yay and yeah wrong. When you are celebrating, it's "yay," not "yeah" and not "yea." Do you know who's not celebrating with you when you write "yeah" and you mean "yay"?
Anyway. So, last night I spoke with the pet psychic. Mostly what we did was visualize Tallulah feeling better, and each morning when I give Lu her cacophony of pills, I have to infuse them with love and imagine them healing her and so on. All the stuff Hulk would hate. But I also got a little insight into my pets.
First of all, my beloved cat, Mr. Horkheimer, came through. She said she felt a lot of tenderness from him toward me. She wondered if I had anything to say to Horkie. I mean, I didn't know I'd run into him. I have a million things to say to that wonderful cat. But what I came up with was that I think about him all the time, and that he was the best cat I've ever had, and I always admired how strong and unflappable he was.
Me, with Horkie, Francis and Ruby on the back of the chair, circa 2002. Dear Marvin: Did you take those really good juice glasses? Goddammit.
I just noticed I'm proofreading a statistics textbook in that photo. Son of a bitch. All the cats are gone, that chair is gone, the JUICE GLASSES ARE GONE DAMN YOU, MARVIN, but the statistics textbooks remain.
She also told me that Edsel needs to understand his worth, so we had to do this meditation together where I showed Edsel that he had a place in my heart without any of the other pets being there, just him. And when he's needy, I'm supposed to thank him for feeling loved, and thank him for going the fuck across the room and lying down like a normal dog.
Only she said it more nicely.
She also told me that Lily was very excited to be home, and that when she ran away she quickly realized she had no idea what she'd gotten herself into. I had to thank Lily for her homing instincts. Lily was also very excited to know she had a place in my heart with no other pets in it, as well. Iris didn't give a shit.
And then NedKitty came through. She misses us; some of us more than others, she said.
She told me that Tallulah felt like when Ned and I fought, it was her fault. Oh, my poor Lu. And she feels like we're here without Ned because of her. She loved Ned and she misses him, and wonders if she could visit him from time to time, and that's why she's anxious. Oh my god, how heartbreaking is that? The psychic told Lu she can spiritually visit Ned any time, just think of him and check in and say hi, and she assured Tallulah that nothing about my relationship with Ned is her fault.
Lu also worries that I'm not okay without Ned, and the psychic assured her I would be.
She said she saw all my pets with their paws on my heart, bringing healing to me. No wonder I can't sleep. She said she saw eight front paws on my heart. Would everyone move so I can roll over? God.
I did not hear from Francis.
So, really, after that we did energy work on Talu, who seems good today, so.
I'd better go. I have a ton of paws on me and need to shower.