I'm trying to think of what I did all weekend that kept me from blogging. Since blogs are out, shouldn't I come up with another verb? Website-ing.
By the way, there's a woman at work who's our social person, and I don't mean she has the gift of gab and is a marvelous hostess. I mean she handles all the social media stuff. Anyway, she says I really need to, you know, get off Typepad and actually have a modern-day place to write. She said people might come here and see how dated this all is and not take me seriously.
As if anyone takes me seriously.
Another guy at work who does things like this said he'll transfer me and my freaking 10 years of blog posts over to Wordpress or Squarespace or whatever for a hundred bucks.
Step one: Get a hundred bucks. But I figure I can do that fairly soon. Bake sale!
Anyway, the weekend. Did I just black out through it or something?
Hang on and I'll upload my pictures from this weekend for a little reminder.
I know I left for Raleigh soon after work Friday--nothing exciting, just had to do some stuff there. Not a date or anything cool like that. I've gotten off the OK ridiculous Cupid for now and made the decision to not date for awhile. So naturally some man harassed Edsel and me on our walk Saturday. I mean, he not only thought I was pretty, but he even said, "Nice dog," which, come on.
By the way, Carrie Bradshaw and Mr. Big totally had a Love Addict/Love Avoidant relationship. Not that I'm obsessed or anything. But they did. I watched reruns this weekend, for a change.
Hey! I just finally thought of something I did this weekend! Dog walk, harassment, Sex and the City, Love Addict obsessing!
My damn pictures finally uploaded, and from this weekend, I found many, many photos of The World's Saddest Dog. Even Iris is concerned at this point. Or perhaps she's waiting for enough ennui that she can attack. Either way.
You've no idea how many times a day he presses his head on me for hugs. You know how I feel about hugs, but I allow it from dogs. Poor Edsel. I just don't know what to do for him. He's lonely, even if he does have a rambunctious cat friend. I realize it's his fault, but he doesn't know that part.
Note the holes in my snow leopard pajamas. They were among my favorites, and this was the first time I've slipped them on all winter, and holes. I have one word for you: That goddamn Lottie. I wore them one last beautiful time, then tossed them. There were holes everywhere. Have I said That goddamn Lottie yet?
Anyway, I spent a lot of time reading this weekend, and doing some writing about the Love Addict/Love Avoidant, because it's my new obsession and it's kind of nice to figure out what the FUCK is wrong with you, but here's my complaint. You read about this--what do you want to call it? Character flaw? Anyway, anything you read about it, it tells you over and over again what it IS, with very little concrete answers for what the hell you DO about it.
"Work on your self-esteem." Oh, fuck off. Okay, let me go "work" on that. Out in the garage. With my tool chest. I mean, everything I read just sort of says vague stuff like that. Probably because the real answer is, you're doomed.
"Practice self-acceptance." Oh, thanks! Clear as a bell.
Actually what they say is one thing Love Addicts can do (and "addict" is kind of a dramatic term. What it really is is an anxious attachment style, which sounds hot. Hello! I'm anxiously attached! Let's go!) is find someone who's securely attached. They said Love Avoidants never really do that, because secure people aren't interesting to them. But that the Love Addict can find a secure attachment person, which is what I did when I found Marvin.
So. There's hope. -ish.
At least I have a new hobby.
Yesterday, when I wasn't obsessing about my disorder, I very Love Addict-ly went to The Other Copy Editor's new old bed and breakfast. I mean, it's an old house that they just got. Above is the soap in the bathroom, which I must find because it was the best-smelling soap, ever. Oh my god.
Anyway, her husband, who is gregarious AF, of course had three friends of his own over, and that was fun, and at some point in the afternoon it dawned on me that those two are around the same ages as Chris and Lilly, and they own a business as do Chris and Lilly, and that maybe they'd all like each other.
So now I'm having them all over for dinner, even though every single person in this scenario actually knows how to cook and I do not. Also, C & L will be forever traumatized by The Edsel Incident, but they're coming over anyway. (I tried to find the old blog post for you but could not. But once, Chris and Lilly were coming for dinner, and Edsel licked the lasagna before they got here. I should have probably not blogged about that, but there you go.)
I'd better go to work and so on, but I'll talk to you tomorrow, when maybe I'll have sad pictures of Edsel to show you. Poor Edsel. I wonder if he's a Love Addict?
Obsessively,
June