Bye Bye, Pie!

Shazbot. Nothing's wrong, I just felt like saying "shazbot."

I hope all y'all all had good Valentine's Days; I had a lovely time. Because it's my holiday. And I am the gross kind of in love. And all that. Ned sent me beautiful red tulips, and I wonder if... Read more →

I'm not sure "every little ting" IS all right, seeing as I have cornrows

Marvin has, in fact, provided video from our early married days. I just spent 240 hours trying to embed this damn video onto this blog and I can't. So here. Here is a link to click. You're gonna want to... Read more →

Your Cheatin' Heart

Guess who stayed out too late, going to Charlie's fundraiser and all? Could it be philanthropists Ned and June? Do you count as philanthropists when all you did was buy tickets, buy drinks, buy one of the tshirts and silently... Read more →

Hair. A look into your future.

I turned in that statistics book...and got another book. This one is due in a week. So I will be working 80 hours this week. Guess what I do not have time for. GUESS! But here. My hair video. Made... Read more →

My assets froze while yours have dropped

I have, as usual, many things to tell you and all of them are dumb. ...I guess technically I have just two things to tell you, but, still, dumb. As you know, my air conditioner has been not what you'd... Read more →

Annoying Girl: June Tries the Curly Girl Method

The exciting news is, I'm going to try the Curly Girl method. I KNOW!!!!! Curly Girl is a book written by some woman. Wait, lemme link to it. She herself has curly hair, and I feel like even so, no... Read more →

If I got yelled at, I'd be upbraided.

Sometimes it's like they're just begging to get on my blog. we not bee on blawg for millyun days, mom. dis kewt enuf? Do you like the nice sheet I have over the couch? I emulated Jackie Kennedy's sheet, from... Read more →

May 14, 1982 and also STORM WATCH! 2013!!!

We're having a big snowstorm--"big" for people in the South--and I smell a gas leak. So the gas co. very dramatically told me to EVACUATE the house and wait for them to come save me, but I've smelled this gas... Read more →

How many of them hormones you been takin', honey?

I just thought of that line from Fried Green Tomatoes and I like it. In reality I am taking zero hormones. In the immortal words of my grandfather, "How do you make a hormone? Don't pay her." Hello! I plan... Read more →

Junela Davis. Your bad-ass blogger.

Dudes, I wasn't even gonna blog at you today, but this happened and we need to discuss. Honest to GOD. With the afro already. Who am I, the white Angela Davis? It's exciting that I'm blogging at you from this... Read more →

Altered June at her altar

First of all, I have half a migraine, so the part where I make 20 errors and am dull as dishwater today is not my fault. And let's talk about that anyway. I am a readist, not a typist. Sometimes... Read more →

Where had I left Sunday. They never make Sunday. Didn't I already title a post with this? Where had I left my originality.

That title is only funny if you know When Harry Met Sally by heart. To which I say, why on earth don't you know that movie by heart? Yesterday I went to Hillsborough with ...friend, who I know I'm being... Read more →

Hair-raising

I went to Raleigh today to get my roots done. And whoever suggested in the comments today (where I previously announced the riveting news that I was in Raleigh with my roots. Being Alex Haley. Rootin' around. Drinking root beer.... Read more →

Kobayashi Maru

Last night I had drama with ...friend, but everything is okay now. I wish I could tell you all about it, but I feel like I'd need his permission to tell the story, and I similarly feel like he'd say,... Read more →

Hot air

Your comments yesterday about your least-favorite songs were the funniest ever. I was in tears laughing. Everyone go read yesterday's comments. I'd cull them, and you know how I like to use the word "cull," but my deadline IS TODAY... Read more →

Madre de Dios

I gots no time to gab today. I just woke up (don't ask) (okay, I was out late with ...friend.) and now I have to scream off to Raleigh to get my hairs done at 12:30. The only way I... Read more →

Coincidentally, I actually HAD the opportunity to say, "My ass would make you a Sunday face."

Before I tell you about the worst date of all time, which in fact is not even true because once in 1988 a guy picked me up already drunk then told me I was white trash before appetizers, and really... Read more →

Coal and ice and fire (or, Trains Are Big)

AACCCKKKK! Sorry. The coffee pot just beeped again. When am I gonna get used to that jarring beeping noise? Last night I went to First Friday with The Fireman. Because I'm all about alliteration. Yes, he DID make me stop... Read more →

Imagine there's no knowing John Lennon. I hate everything.

Yesterday I tried to walk off the humiliation of my recent humiliation. (Once I was in a car accident, and my then-boyfriend rushed sort of dramatically to the ER. They thought I had just a mild concussion, but when I... Read more →

This story blows

Yesterday I hauled myself out to Raleigh, there, to get my roots done because I was rootin' out. If I were in a garden, I'd be one of the root vegetables. If I were having a good time, it'd be... Read more →

Goldilocks

As if painting the dining room and the hutch and waiting to hear about my MRI weren't fun enough, this morning I've been shopping for car insurance. I know! Marvin is taking me off his car insurance, and fortunately I... Read more →

June gets vinegar-y

A few days ago, I mentioned that I had a bunny in college. My friend Dottie was kind enough to email me a photo of that lovely time of my life. Let's talk. First off, how did I not puncture... Read more →

A new style! A new look! A new you!

First of all, thank you all so much for all your kind words yesterday. Marvin said, "Look how many people are in support of our failing marriage!" Did I mention he bugs me? Did I mention he's the president of... Read more →

Coco hair. Which could get sticky.

Thank you all for being nice to me yesterday. What would I do without my nice commenters? It's like I have my own Greek chorus. In the meantime, I want to cut off all my hair. Which I always want... Read more →

An update on the hair. Since y'all are obsessed.

Apparently, you are all still interested in my hair, which just goes to show you there is no telling what will fascinate you people. We're coming up on hour 72 since I had said chemical straightening treatment, which means I... Read more →

The new June Gardens

I didn't even get dressed yet and I stampeded to the computer to show you my hair. Who's a good blogger? I was there for FIVE HOURS AND FIFTEEN MINUTES. Seriously. I mean, I should have been coming out of... Read more →

In which June goes with the flow

Here it is! The day we've all been waiting for! And if you have your giant "June's Beauty Treatments" calendar next to your huge "June's Illnesses" calendar, you already know THIS IS THE DAY I GET THE OVERPRICED HAIR STRAIGHTENING... Read more →

It's not Fahrenheit

Yesterday was Marvin's first day home from school. At 8:00 in the morning, he put on his shark head from our party Saturday, LEAPED onto the bed, and started biting at me. It's going to be a long summer. Do... Read more →

Orange you glad I took a picture of my interview hair?

I'm back from my job interview. I got there at 10 after 10:00, because my interview was supposed to start at 10:30 and I am a freak, and I didn't leave there until after 12:30, so that's a good sign,... Read more →

Doppler hair

I have a ton of work to do all of a sudden, so I cannot talk to you, girl. Although I don't know how I'm gonna GET to said work. There seems to be an orange herring in my way.... Read more →

Fringe

I understand that I have the world's most fake smile in this photograph, and I do not know why. However, as soon as I took this picture, the stupid stupid stupid battery died on my camera and that was the... Read more →